sunday bloody sunday

...i have absolutely nothing positive to say about today.
it was awful. it was so many different types of hell that i feel like i've died and gone there and back.

to be honest, it was that awful and busy that i didn't even have time to stop and jot down what was pissing me off.
this was my first sunday shift in over a year and a half (after a delayed break, i am back on them permantly.) and MY GOD have times changed.
it used to be a nice, quiet shift...well it used to perk up after about 11am...but before that it was as dead as a dodo.
but no, not now...from the moment i came in at 8 till i finished at 4...it was mad.
we also had the delights of having no big bags (again!) and so i had to keep offering 10p refusable bags. this was because nobody was considerate enough to get a small amount of shopping...no, they had to have baskets that were spilling out at the sides, or even worse...trolleys that were spilling out at the sides.
actually, most people were greatful for reusable bags...but no, one of the stand out moments of the shift was this black woman who obviously wanted a bag but didn't want to pay for one. this was the dialouge:

me - "we don't actually have any big bags at the moment...so you can either have loads of the little bags, or you can buy a reusable bag."
her - "i dont want to buy a bag."
me - "okay, i will give you a few little bags then."
so i start attempting to pack her stuff into the impossible minature bags of doom and she interrupts!
her - "how are you going to get it all in there? how much exactly are these reusable bags?"
me - "10p."
her - "show me one."
i trundle off to get one, smiling away to myself because i just KNEW this woman was going to be awkward about the whole thing.
i walk back to the till with the bag in my hand and lift it up whilst doing a sarcastic little smile that said "this good enough for ya?!?!"
she then decides she doesn't want it because "she isn't paying for a bag when she has loads at home!" (a comment i always find deplorable - it's your fucking fault you left them at home, not mine! either buy a new one or shut up when i hand you over 65 little bags!)
so, yet again, i attempt to pack her stuff into small bags, and yet again, she interrupts.
her - "how are you going to get it all in there?!!??" she screams once more.
me - "i'll give it a go" (said in a cheery tone to hide the fact she was seriously getting on my wick by this point.)
she then decides she will have to concede this fight and buy a bag. i can't remember the exact wording of the rest of the conversation...but it was very evident that she was going to try and argue the toss until i said "oh, here you go...have it for free!"
well, i wasn't giving in. especially after the "i have bags at home" comment. well piss off home and get them, then.

rar. people like that seriously break my soul. if they are after a free bag, at least have the foresight to think that maybe being cheery and polite is the way to go about it.
not talk to me like a dick.
oh, also, she was the same person who 10 minutes earlier asked me where sweetcorn was.
now, i went round the shop and showed her every possible variety of sweetcorn we do.
"we have it frozen?"
"no. dont want it frozen."
"well, we have it on the cob..."
"no, i hate cob."
"okay, well we have it tinned?"
"no, hate it tinned. it makes my teeth play up."

WELL HOW OTHER WAY CAN YOU BUY SWEETCORN? seriously, am i just being stupid or is there another way to purchase sweetcorn? because i seriously love the stuff and have never seen it in any other way other than those three. well, at least, my shop don't stock any other kind.
so after the little tut and sigh they always do when they don't get their own way...she decides to buy peas instead. frozen.

WTF?!?!?!

i don't really remember much else about the day...because it was so tedious that it all blurred into one horrid block of memory.
all i remember is that pretty much every customer was either rude, arrogant, stupid or plain weird.

there was the old man who couldn't seem to comprehend what shower gel was.

him - "wheres the shower gel? don't tell me you don't bloody stock it?"
me - "yes, of course we stock it. hang on a sec, and i'll show you."

the reason i said "hang on a sec" was because i was already dealing with another customer who wanted to know if we sold "diet pepsi rather than pepsi max" and because i am of the same opinion that diet pepsi is much nicer than pepsi max i felt they deserved my full attention and sincere apologies for our lack of stocking it.
anyway, after i'd finished with my first customer...off i went to go and help out mr. shower gel.

he was standing at the health and beauty section, staring at it with wild eyes.
him - "well?!?"
me - "there you go...it's just there" (said whilst pointing at at it so obviously i was almost prodding the damn bottles.)
him - "eh? WHERE?"
me - "just there. look - shower gel, shower gel, and more shower gel." (i said whilst this time actually touching each different brand of shower gel as i went along.)
him - "oh, it all looked like bubble bath to me."

WHAT??!?! doesn't the label that reads "shower gel" give it away at all?

i also got the joys of serving him at the till which was even worse.
he didn't bother taking his items out of his trolley even though i asked him, too so i had to lean over and get it all out myself. he kept changing his mind what batteries he wanted.
he'd ask for double A, so i'd go and get double A. he'd then decide he wanted triple A, so i'd go and get triple A.
actually, in fact, he wanted 9 volt! so, after grabbing what seemed like 4749795795 different types of batteries...he wanted the ones i went and got last - i swear it was all just a twisted game to him.

then there were the pikey girls who decided they wanted to pay for all their stuff together but have it all in different bags.
fine, no problem...but when i explained it would have to be in little bags because we had no big bags they responded with "can't we have a big bag?"

oh.my.god. do you have ice cream instead of a brain?!

why was i surprised, though? one was dressed like they'd bagged a bargain at oxfam, the other one was in pjamas, and the other one...i don't even know what her clothes were. they were just HORRIBLE. their hair didn't even looked remotely brushed, i couldn't tell whether their faces were dirty or just tanned. they smelt. and they left their manners at the door.
so after i explained for the second time "we have no big bags at the moment, sorry..." the head pikey rolled her eyes, turned round to the other two and said "dhya fink we should just leave it, babes?"

they spent a minute or two deciding whether they actually wanted to go ahead with it or not...by which time i was rolling my own eyes and started staring out of the window in apathy.
finally, they decided "actually, ya. we'll have the tiny bags innit."
thanks for that, girls. you now owe me five minutes of my life back.

the horrible little creatures kept snatching the bags off of me everytime i passed them a newly packed one, and they didn't even say thank you or goodbye.

god, i hate rude people like that. especially rude people like that who can't get themselves dressed in the morning.


oh! a few more points of annoyance that i can remember -

1. being stuck on the till for 45 minutes more than i should have been because the lead swinger who was supposed to be taking me off delibrately kept making up jobs they had to finish off and dawdling so i they didn't have to go on there.
2. people who let me spend five minutes packing their stuff in a bag and then AFTER i finished doing it took it all back out again whilst telling me "i don't need a bag."
3. the fact it took me a whole hour and a half to tidy up one fricking cage because it was so busy. i hate not being able to finish a job off for ages. especially one that should take you 10 minutes at the very most.
4. the little kid who came up to me as i was filling milk, with a half eaten, half trod on ice cream that we don't even sell. "i don't want this anymore." she says, handing it to me and walking off.
oh, and i do? i chucked it away with a shudder...i hate saliva. especially child saliva.
and where the hell were the parents, anyway?

and that's about it, really. it was an awful, awful day...the weekend customers are so different from the week day customers. they are a totally different breed.
i think in the whole eight hours i only served 4 or 5 nice people. thats not very much at all if you consider how many people i actually serve in one day.
however, it did go quick...and i suppose it's not all bad - i do get paid a bit extra for the pleasure.

anyway, i'm on the early tomorrow...i enjoy my monday shifts. plus, after what i went through today...i doubt i'll be moaning much about the customers - at least the rude people and the nutters will be the ones i am used to. come back weekday weirdos; all is forgiven!

until next time xxx